Language:The Incog Tool

In today’s world minding ones tongue can be as difficult to watch as catching a greased pig…with your feet. The struggle to tie words together without an obscenity is becoming increasingly difficult as the social apparatus becomes more abstract. We have peers that tick us off, children that drive us crazy, and bumps and bruises that ,without profanity, seem to be much more painful than it looks. So how do we rid ourselves of a foul mouth? Well…an universal answer remains to be seen and the ‘Swear Jar’ method only makes the guilty party want to curse more! “Damn you money hungry jar of dread!”…I’m starting to think the swear jar is a government experiment created to exploit us during verbal vulnerability and extort us..but that’s just I’m just kidding of course! However, language is something that a gentleman must master! Although I put a focus on the negativity of language there are also a slew of positives both of which I will cover in this section. Whether you agree or disagree I just hope in the end we can all walk away from this war of words minus the F-bombs. Let’s continue…

Awareness Is Key

Be aware of how you conduct yourself and what you say

Be aware of how you conduct yourself and what you say

Easier said than done ,yes I know, but trust me gentlemen if you pay more attention to the words that pour out your mouth you’ll be surprised at some of the things you say or rather how frequently you say it. Let’s be honest here, we all have a favorite obscenity or vulgarity we like to spew every now and again, even I’ve been guilty many a times but that is why we walk this path together. I learned through self-awareness that a great percentage of your language can easily be altered into a form free of potty talk. One way to achieve this is to simply think before you speak,for temperamental occurrences try taking a deep breath when a situation has you ticked, express your frustration through writing and tear up the paper afterwards or listen to your favorite song(One free of foul language of course) and repeat this process until you see gradual changes in your speech. These methods are most useful when you’re on the fly and nowhere near the comfort and security of your home, there are other practices that can be executed like swear substitutes and phrase modifications but these require more privacy and self dialogue which is something you can practice at home. Another way to watch your tongue is to actually have someone else do it for you, ask a close friend of yours to alarm you whenever you stray from clean language, give yourself a limit and continue to lower that limit as your language improves. If you’re a determined fellow place friendly wagers with your friend, for example; if you can go an entire day without foul language or it’s intent than your friend pays for your next lunch together, however, if you fail to keep your language clean than you must pay, chances are your friend will try to make you very apprehensive and test you, whether you fail or pass is completely on your self-awareness so lets clean that potty mouth of yours, you’ll need it for that free sirloin steak you’re going to win.




For those of us who are visual learners here’s a great way to watch your tongue…watch your tongue..well..not exactly but performing the most vulgar things you can say in front of a mirror helps..confused? Don’t allow me to elaborate…when we feel a certain way and reach a level of anxiety our thought processes become scrambled and we lose the power in our choice of words, our tongues often slip but there is a way to avoid this lapse in speech. Stand in front of a mirror and spawn a stressful situation or relive something that really ticked you off and say the most hateful and despicable things you can say..let it out your system..once you’re done and you’re staring at yourself in the mirror really pay attention to how you feel and how you imagine if a hundred people were also staring at you. The moments after tantrums are usually when we are at our most vulnerable, we feel regret, stupidity, upset, and most of all ashamed at our actions. It is truly hitting rock bottom momentarily and it’s at these times we wish we would’ve handle things differentially. Luckily for you this is a simulation so after you leave your dramatization act out more positive outcomes to situations in which your words are more powerful than your actions. If your mirror time consist of less extreme circumstances pretend the mirror is another person, like a rude co-worker who doesn’t take well to others being kind to them. They are usually the most difficult to deal with so find ways around their guard without making them uncomfortable and frustrating yourself, or perhaps you’re visualizing a crush of yours but can’t seem to get the correct words out, practice your timing and the things you really want to say it, that way when it counts you can stop and go on a dime in smooth transition. The beautiful thing about visualization is how powerful and convenient it is, you don’t have to act out everything as a rehearsal, a lot of it can be done while at work, school, at home cleaning or out and about. Visualizing is a powerful tool that I come to rely on everyday and I highly suggest to my fellow gentlemen that are stuck on that social ladder to try it out. I may catch some fire for the more extreme section of visualization but as I said it is a very powerful mechanism and I want the best for my brothers in ties, becoming a true gentleman is so much more than being great and social with truly requires a transformation from deep within..some deeper than others and within these depths you will find your foundation but in order to reach that foundation and build upon it you have to push away the negativity and obstacles that litter your way. You can’t build a house on beaten and battered have to haul it out and replace it, for one to break himself and build himself back up into the man he wants to be is no easy feat, but the nobility it takes and the accolades that come along with it are very much worth it. It’s not often you become a better you and get recognized and praised for it, on the road to becoming a perfect gentleman you will become a perfect you..just visualize it..can’t you see yourself doing great things?…Yes I know you do…I told you it was a powerful tool.

Feel It Out

Get use to the feeling

Get use to the feeling

In the first section I asked you to be self-aware,in the second section I asked you to visualize,now that you mastered those two let’s combine the them and feel it out. When it’s time to deliver that high profiled speech you’ve been working on or confront that pessimistic boss of yours you will not be able to visualize or be self-aware nor would you want to. You practice visualization and awareness so that when you speak you can feel what you’re saying and ultimately manifest into your message. If you are trying to visualize success while presenting your ideas to executives of your company how will your speech remain precise, smooth and coherent? If you’re sitting in your boss’s office explaining your tardiness you can easily become over aware and have an anxiety attack, this may lead your boss to believe you are trying to cover up something and your job may very well be in jeopardy. When we feel our message the words take shape, form follows function, when an athlete prepares throughout the week for a big game they visualize throughout film study and become more aware of their techniques during practice but on game day everything comes together and they feel their game out to guide them, your language is no different.

And that wraps up our section on language, I sure hope you guys were able to take something away from this passage and if you were share it with a friend. If this didn’t help than please comment below and let us know why you were displeased, we will listen and make more complete pages in the future so that everyone will be happy. Drop a like while you’re here and remember to keep those swear jars empty, good day and see you soon



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